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Make Your own Experience

November 17, 2011

Make Your own Experience

One thing I dislike is when people try to push on me their own experiences. Before I moved here so many of my German friends was warning me and trying to convince me that I would not like Germany giving reasons. I had to pack my own groceries. I have no problem packing my own groceries, I actually like doing it. It save me less time or trying to organize what go where when I am unpacking in the kitchen. Plus I don’t have to worry about my eggs or loaf of bread getting smash. Not all Germans are nice. I have to agree because not everyone in any culture are nice. It is normal to have good and bad anywhere and in any nationality. It is just people being people.

When I first came here a person online told me I was not going to find the type of living space I am looking for. We found our dream temporary home in which we currently live in after almost two months of looking. It is 5 bedrooms spaces flat. No cut off ceiling, not located in a damp basement, 5 minute away from the stadmitte (downtown), and a short walk to the castle. We of course do not use all the rooms for bedrooms. That would be pointless for just me and the hubster. We made them into a walk in closet, fitness room, office, guest room/hobby room, and of course our bed room. This same person try to scare me about going to my first OBGYN appointment. Telling me that I would have to take off my trouser in the doctor office where he/she examine me and run around the room trouser less with people constantly coming and leaving out the room. She was half correct. The doctors that I go to all have changing rooms where I can hang up or fold my trouser. When I am ready than I help myself onto the table.Ā  The ones I been too have not gave me a robe or anything in which I have no problem with. I take them as professional people and love all my lovely flab. This young lady also went into detail and describe the room and the table. As I mention the rooms of my many doctors came nothing close to her description and my examination table was the same normal examination table as in America.

Online some people say Germans are rude, they do not like foreigners. As I mention above bs, people are people. Some people mention it is hard to integrate here and compare everything to home. I say it is easy to integrate if you just let go but do not lose who you are and have fun exploring Germany or Europe. There are so many wonderful quality and massive amount of history surrounding us. In which we can touch, sit on, visit, take photo of, heck even sleep in. Yes, it is hard when one is not fluent with the language but if you attempt learning it and speaking it. The people are happy to help you out and appreciate you for trying. Even when they laugh at your pronunciation:))

Another I hear a lot is that it is hard to become friends with German unless you have a child. That is so much bs. Not every German wear a protective shield for you not to pass by it. They stare at you walking down the street because you are new to them. Perhaps they heard you speaking and bought back fond memories of their visit in America. They are easy to reach out to if you decide to talk to them. Some people say Germans do not like small talk. So not true. How can you get to know someone without first having small talk? I say if you want to be friends with a German or any nationality you have to be the one to make the first move. As living here I have learned that some will just stare you down until you make the attempt to talk to them and invite them for coffee. You don’t need a child to be friends with a German or any nationality you just need to be sincere and be yourself. So they can like you for who you are.

Point blank is when you move to a certain city, state, or country do not soak in what people tell you of what a place is all about. Use what they say as some what as a guide but do not make it an official guide. Make your own experience and discover your new home.

13 Comments leave one →
  1. November 17, 2011 9:43 pm

    Thanks for the cultural lesson. It is comforting to know that you and other Black people are accepted into these white countries of Europe. Miami is so mixed race it is no big deal. Actually it is funny because the whites are now the small minority. My 5 grandchildren are somewhat mixed. Step grandson Dillon is white Anglo, grandchild Maya Anglo, Cuban, Italian. Step grandchild Armonni is African American, granddaughter Crislynd is Haitian, Cuban and Italian and little Vincent is African American, Cuban and Italian.

    • November 17, 2011 10:06 pm

      I so miss Florida especially right now with the weather over here getting colder…..

      Your welcome but it was more of an observation from the part of Europe and Germany I been to so far. I am like all over the net and there are a few forums that people always go into and ask “where is it safe for a black person to move to”, “will I fit in or be look like an outcast”, “is Germany racist?”, and so much more. I understand that Europe is dominantly a white country but it too as a mixture of people. Not so much as others but it does as a mixture. Am I saying that Germany is a safe haven to live in, no, I am not. Like any part of the world you have hate groups who don’t like people just because.

      On a better note I do love the sound of your grandchildren. Mixture indeed is beautiful.

  2. November 17, 2011 11:21 pm

    Hunny.. people are ignorant. Just let them go in one ear and out the other. People think we Yankees are all hillbillies, LOL
    I also like to bag my own groceries for that same reason šŸ™‚

    • November 18, 2011 9:10 am

      Yes they are that is why I tend to hear what people say but make my own judgement and experience. No one live the same life. Everyone life is different. That is one reason I will never understand people when they push and push their experience on a person and end it with “wait and see”. smh

  3. November 18, 2011 2:25 am

    What I found with Germans is if you try to mix in and make an effort they love it. Especially when u try to speak their language.

    They are normal people just like us and there is no racism either as people tend to think there is.

    • November 18, 2011 9:20 am

      Agree they are normal people as well but there is a bit of discrimination with certain groups. But everyone do not feel like this only a handful of knuckle heads. Some because they think certain group are coming in and free loading off the system, others because of history, and some just because. I have not seen or read any hate crimes since I been here so far thank goodness.

  4. November 18, 2011 9:46 am

    All very nicely point. I felt no culture shock at all when I came here. I just accepted that some things would be a bit different. I love just about everything about it here. Do I dislike some aspects? Sure. But I dislike some aspects of the States, too. No place is going to be perfect.

    And yes, I don’t like when people push their experiences on me either. If *you* don’t like something, or do like something for that matter, just say so. But don’t tell me that I automatically will feel the same, because I’m not *you*.

    • November 18, 2011 12:15 pm

      Reading your comment I heard the church choir sang:) Because I 100% agree with you and like how you put it!

  5. November 19, 2011 7:55 am

    I don’t think I need to type much because you made a great point with this article :). I also heard the church choir sing lol

  6. November 19, 2011 9:11 am

    Moving from my home town to Saudi Arabia, and now here in Europe is a culture shock for me. But as what you said to do your own experience is the best way to get over the anxiety.
    I think your right about people staring at you! Because we are new to their eyes as we are new in town. But sometimes it kills my nerves as they stared to hard on me. But I used to it I stare them back to with a smile then I guess it shame them to put down their head and eyes away from me then goes back to stare me again.:)

    Ohhh will it is what it is.:)

    • November 20, 2011 1:50 pm

      lol, I understand too well what your saying about the staring:) Your reaction is very nice. To stare back and smile at them. That normally does it and if close by with a nice hello. Eventually all that staring after a while feel like nothing. I think I am even taking up their bad habit of doing the same. I use to glance at people and look away, now I am actually staring at them by detailing them, lol

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