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Having a Conscious is a heck of a Thing

November 8, 2010

Having a conscious can be a heck of a thing.
Normally I do not tend to write my blogs/posts early in the day. More in the afternoon because one never know how the day will end. I am writing now to try to calm down a bit.

This morning I woke up bright and early to go to the doctor. Meanwhile I was waiting on John I decided to take the clothes from the dryer and put them up and the clothes from the washer into the dryer. Tell me why I found my friend Metro card in the washer! I was like “Oh my God, how did that get in there”! I tend to normally check my pockets first before I place anything in the washer. So I am thinking either it was in my back jean pocket or in the pocket of my apron. I was cleaning out the refrigerator last night getting rid of a few leftovers. Some of the left over spilled out on me and on the floor. So I took off everything and threw them in the washer. Perhaps this is the time I did not stop and think to check my pockets.

So I am holding my friend card frantically in my hands. The edges are lift. The first thing came to my mind is crazy glue. I ask John if he has any he of course said no and ask why. I explain it to him. He continued making jokes of how I am careless and how I ruin his credit card a few months ago in the washer. I explained to him that’s not helping I need crazy glue now. He took a look at the card and said nope you can’t glue it up. The bar strip area is lifted and have a slight tear. If I glued it up it will not work so just be honest and pay for the replacement card. After he suggested that I emailed her right away to let her know I dearly apologize and I plan to bring up the card when I think she is awake. Man I feel so crappy that my stomach start hurting me. I cannot deal with stress very well and try my best to stay away from it and if not then my hardest to deal with it. I am sure it won’t be a biggy to her. She is very understanding and nice. It is me who is always beating up myself when I am in the wrong.

If your wondering what is Metro. Metro is a big store like Costco or perhaps bigger. The difference is that it is only for people who have a business license. If you don’t have a business license you can not enter or sign up for membership unlike Costco where you can. It has two levels. Metro sells food, food you can not find at most places (many people who own restaurant of course buy here), decorations, kitchen wares, tools, appliances, clothes, carpet, tv, computers, electronics, sport area, things for cars, bicycle area, fitness area, carpets, you name it and they have it. Except for sofa, bed, mattress. But they do have office furnishers.

I went up to my friend flat to give her her card. She said to me that it does not look so bad. I showed her the back where the magnet is. She said no biggy she can possibly replace it. I still felt bad and was constantly apologizing. In the world today there are a handful of people who will do something for you without wanting something back. A person who is really giving/doing something from the heart. I have many people in my life thank God for that and my friend upstairs to me is one. She did not have to give me her Metro card for me to use. She did not have to tell me to keep it until the weekend encase we need to get something else. But she did. She did a warm hearted act and I appreciated and felt crummy because I destroy someone/her possession. Yes, it was an accident but I still felt awful. So I was trying to give her compensation for the card and she continue giving me back. Then I explain to her as I mention above and tears started to pour out of my eyes (I am too darn emotional at times). She gave me a hug and said come sit down and have tea. We sat down and had tea together talking and laughing. We hug and I left to go back to my flat. I felt all is okay now. When I went to take off my sweater the money I gave her felt out of my pocket. She must had sneak it back in during the hug, lol. That is okay. I emailed her to please let me know the replacement cost of her card so I can at least pay for it when she finds out.

This is my update I can now take a nap peacefully without fighting myself. I hope you all are having a better day than I am!

4 Comments leave one →
  1. November 8, 2010 7:37 pm

    Hey – it was just an accident, don’t feel too bad! Glad your friend was cool with it though!

    • November 8, 2010 8:38 pm

      Yeah me too. If the shoes was on the other foot I would of understand too. I just hate not giving a person something that they gave me back in the condition that they gave me. But all is well thank goodness.

  2. November 10, 2010 11:41 pm

    Hey Lora,
    Don’t beat yourself up!! It’s such a bad thing to do to yourself because it is just guilt and by the way, that’s a pretty useless emotion. Of course I;m one to talk, lol lol. I have the Catholic guilt gene.
    I wanted to suggest you change your ID on my blog. If you’re not using the Starting Over in Germany blog and want readers to find you and your blog you should use this blog as your ID. I don’t know whether a reader has a choice of how to ID themselves on my blog. Just a thought.

    • November 11, 2010 9:39 am

      Hi Lori thanks. I did some test. My username is my ID. The only thing I can change is my writer name which is not the same as the ID. The writer name is shown on the very top of each post and comment where it say for example “Posted by pbenjay on November 10, 2010 at 11:41 pm”. This I can change to anything but not my ID because the username and ID are one.

      When I first open up this blog it gave me the option of picking which blog I wanted to be my primary and I picked this one. So people will find me on here. For searching on giving topics people find me by my tags. In my static page on dashboard I can tell how many people find me in a day just from word press search along. Most read and move on and some subscribe.

      When you click my name in your blog it should come straight to here not the other blog. Plus startingoveringermany fit me perfectly … don’t you think.I still talk a bit about my experience here. I just don’t feel limited to “only” talk about Germany.

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